1. SM Detox

I’m convinced social media detox is something I need to do often. I love the feeling of not being constantly digitally connected, with the exception of the blogs.

Kyra, who blogs at Life, Art, and Chocolate, recently said something that resonated with me in her The Greater Disconnect series, “Social media became a place of ‘I have, and you haven’t, but don’t you wish you had?’ and ‘Me too, we’re in the same group and all those others are missing out!’” To read her sobering account on social media and self-worth, or just to admire her amazing art, visit her blog.

2. The joy of watching sunsets

I’ve never been a camper, and I’m still not. We are not buying a caravan either. But I enjoyed our camping holiday. It is one of the loveliest ways of exploring Finnish nature. Water (sea, lake or river) is a focal feature in most campsites. The ambiance is just perfect for rekindling romance.

Poroholma Resort & Camping, Rauma

3. I’m still reading

At the moment, I’m enthralled by Mrs O’s Becoming. I find her story really inspiring, and a written with such grace and sincerity. I’ll do a write up soon, I hope, on five books I’ve found most impactful this summer.

4. Oh, how I love the smell of roses

It’s no secret, I love the countryside. The unhurried rhythm, unscheduled activities, catching up with friends who are also on holiday, and spending time with my loving in-laws are some of things I’m grateful for. The scent of roses become even sweeter, when surrounded by loved ones.

5. “Reciprocity is not mandatory”

… yet I know its importance, when it comes to maintaining relations and staying in touch with communities. I read somewhere that when it comes to blogging, growing one’s readership is more important than being loyal to your “few” existing readers. I’m of a different opinion.

I spoke about my cutting back on blogging here, because of a new undertaking or rather going back to the old new world of business. So, I’ll be leaning more on reciprocity, that is, giving back or spreading the love.

So, I’m interested to know, in what ways do you like to get exposure on the blogs and social media? I’m asking this so I know how to support you my fellow writer and blogger for your consistent support of my modest blog.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts.

Occasionally, I share five random things I’m reading, watching, doing and thinking about. You’re most welcome to join the conversation.

Khaya Ronkainen
Khaya Ronkainen is a writer, poet and creative professional. Her blog focuses on all things poetry and creative nonfiction.


  1. Good quotes about social media. I’m glad I haven’t been on there in 5 years. I’m glad you’re detoxing off parts of the net.

  2. I feel social media is really unconsciously toxic. Those of us who are older can see it. I feel for the younger generation who grow up with it not realizing how it affects them.
    That sunset photo is stunning!
    For me my blog is simple. I use it as a journal to document memories. Sharing it and interacting with other bloggers across the globe makes it even more enjoyable.

  3. Oh I love that picture! It sounds like a lovely trip! Thank you for the mention, as well!

    As far as exposure… You know, I’m know quite sure. I’m an old blogger, back to it again after a many year absence. I don’t know that many people even really visit blogs anymore. Really, most people are online searching keywords and tags for what they’re specifically looking for, rather than reading. Art has the advantage of making a fast impression and if someone likes it, they tend to slow down and stay a spell. The world has changed and I feel like either there are no rules anymore, or I don’t quite know them yet!

  4. Now that’s a record, not been on social media in 5 years. Good for you! I honestly think it’s a sensible thing to do, and I aspire to that.

  5. I know Maga about social media issues, and touch wood, indeed. May good spell continue!

    What excites me more is the prospect of your book. I hope, hope you manage to squeeze or make space to concentrate on it. I’m looking forward to holding that book in my hands one day, soon.

    Yes, please do think about my question!

    Now heading over to read your random bits. Btw, I’m glad my idea is worthy stealing. Use it freely, there’s no patent…LOL!

  6. I fear for youngsters as well, Val. A young person’s life can be destroyed by the hate spewed on SM.

    I like the simplicity of your blog, and using it to journal memories. The sharing and interacting with other bloggers has always been my main aim, too.

    By default, poetry attracts small crowds and I somehow like that, when it comes to blogging. But I’ve learned some lessons, when I decide to start over my blog; for one numbers (followers, likes, etc.) seem to matter a lot to others. Of course, we all blog for different reasons.

  7. Thanks Kyra, it was a lovely trip. And you’re welcome about The Greater Disconnect mention. It’s a great and thought-provoking article.

    As an old blogger myself, I’ve seen a decline in blog reading; overtaken by social media I guess or time constraints or simply our short reading span or information overload.

    Art has an advantage indeed, for the visual impression it makes. Perhaps, that’s why every post is accompanied by an image, nowadays.

    But I believe there is still a large number of people, who enjoy long form, myself included. I have standing subscription with long form blogs such as Long Reads, The Johannesburg Review of Books, and more other blogs like yours. I get really excited, when I see notifications pop up on my inbox. I guess one must love to read to begin with. 🙂

  8. Thank you H for reading. People often ask if I don’t miss home (South Africa) and I get where they are coming from. But this (Finland) is my home, and to a larger extent is due to my loving Finnish family. I feel like the luckiest girl in that regard. 🙂

  9. Social media.
    I don’t have the complaints I read about. My friends post about the good, the bad and the ugly. Their happiness, their sorrows and their passions.

    I have made amazing friends on Facebook, who introdixedme to their valued friends. Visited each other, even in different countries and participated in each other’s lives. People I would never have crossed paths with. I have found love and heart breaks on Facebook.

    But I find the complaints very interesting, some say, people show off too much or fake their lives or display their insensitivity or stupidity, etc. I find it no different from real life in South Africa. People I don’t know appear to be in extremes when I pass them, I look around and see happy people, depressed people, people I cannot read.

    But I know my experience is universal so I empathize with you.

    “Reciprocity is not mandatory”
    I suspect this is why I have a lovekl experience on Facebook. We have a similar approach I think.

    The scent of roses.
    This put a smile on my face. I see you have a thing for smells. Roses and soil after rain.

  10. Hi Pale! It’s really good to hear you have a lovely experience on FB. Because it is supposed to be that way, for people to connect and socialize. Some friendships grow beyond social media and blogs, I’ve been lucky with this as well. The power of internet, in genera, is amazing. But there is unfortunately a dark side, too.

    I’m pleased to hear my simple joys brought a smile on your face. And yes, I have a thing for nature, outdoors and gardening too, when in the country. 🙂

  11. “the power of the Internet, in general, is amazing. But there is unfortunately a dark side, too” I agree.

  12. I guess so. Hahaha! I’m just a blogger and haven’t been on social media. Things have been more productive for me that way.

  13. I’ve met some dear friends through social media, but I’ve also been depressed by it too. Not in the “I have way” you mentioned, at least I don’t think. More by the ubiquitousness of cruelty and stupidity. I have to learn that there are particularly thick windmills not worth tilting at. I have gotten better, and that’s trimmed down my time by a lot.

    Hmmm… I’m not sure about the ways I like to get exposure on my blogs or social media. I mean exposure is awesome; it helps sell books. 😀 But I like it when good interactions/ conversations happen on either one.

  14. I think it’s good to have time out from social media, it’s so refreshing.
    That sunset photograph is stunning.

    Enjoy your weekend.

    All the best Jan

  15. Oh yes, I get you. As I’ve mentioned, in one of the comments, I’ve met some wonderful people and made great acquaintances through social media. That’s the beauty of it. But cruelty more than the competition really, i’ts something I’ve experienced. So, yes trimming is the way to go.

    With the reciprocity, as you might have noticed with my long or detailed comments, I value mutual interactions that happen naturally. With the question, I’m bouncing ideas. Because there’s a certain curiosity I’m observing. Maybe one day, I’ll write about lessons learned from starting my blog over. 😀

  16. Hmmm. I think reciprocity is pretty necessary. I don’t if it’s mandatory or not. I make sure to visit anyone’s blog who has visited my own, and I pretty much follow everyone in the reader; however, there are only a select few (like you) whose blogs I subscribe to.

  17. And you have no idea how I appreciate your subscription, Kathy. Thank you. <3

    Law of Reciprocity is incredibly powerful, and necessary for networking whether personally or professionally.

    When I say it's not mandatory, I'm speaking from a place where (like you) I always make sure to visit, read, comment, follow or subscribe on anyone's blog, who does the same for me.

    But there are also those I read regularly, who don't reciprocate (whether because of time constraints, too big a platform to respond to everyone, etc.) and that's OK too. Because it's not mandatory for them to reciprocate as it's not mandatory for me to keep reading them. 🙂

  18. I think it’s good to be off of social media once and a while and to not be on all of them! I’m not on facebook and so happy I’m not! LOL! Your holiday looks amazing!!! Wow! I think by going back to the people who have commented on your blogs, or mentioning them on your blog, is a wonderful way to reciprocate! Big Hugs!

  19. I cannot tell you how good it felt to be on a break from SM! I seriously envy you for not being on FB. 🙂 I’m also seriously rethinking my social media engagements as a whole. Because as you put it, we don’t need to be on all of them. It’s simply not worth the effort.

    Thanks Stacy, my holiday was indeed wonderful but short as usual. Now it’s back to the grind.

    I’m glad you find my way of reciprocating meaningful. I love blogging (the pace, and the fact that I’m in control with what happens here) more than any other interaction on SM. I intend to keep sharing my appreciation and support through the blog. Big Hugs xx

  20. I’ve developed a community of online friends through blogging and I actually care about what they’re up to. I do take breaks from blogging, as do they. It’s necessary. Even on Twitter, there are people I have come to ‘know’ and we support each other — strange, as Twitter can be an angry place. Facebook is that in-between space — I can dip in from time to time and check up on my contacts, including friends I haven’t seen or heard from in a while.

  21. Thank you for your visit, Cynthia. Yes, blogging communities are a wonderful thing. We connect, support and grow together, and sometimes form friendships that thrive beyond the blogs. But I agree, it is necessary to take blogging breaks as it is a time-consuming exercise.

    I’m glad to hear there are people who support each other on Twitter. To me, it comes across as an angry place. FB works as that ‘between space’ for me as well, at the moment.

  22. Mmm…. interesting! I think I’m with you when it comes to keep supporting my longtime blog buddies! And this is the problem for me… I’m constantly worried that I’m neglecting my duties… even though I sometimes apologise for not calling around more often, I still feel guilty!
    I won’t do any of the facebook platforms… but I have a Twitter account – often I don’t go there for days. Then I go to upload photos. I enjoy posting articles on LinkedIn… maybe because there’s better manners and control there – self regulated, to a large degree.
    Lately, I’ve been doing internet radio… and that takes a few hours a day, almost daily! However, I’m finding my feet and really enjoy it – I think you may enjoy the music so feel free to occasionally drop in, please! It is on a UK Veteran’s platform, they have accepted me in with open arms and I would love to spread the “love…”!!
    Yes, I love blogging best of all social media… and playing rock DJ… that beats it all! 😉

  23. Yeah, I have a love-hate relationship with social media. I keep FB mainly to interact with family and friends afar. Twitter is just not for. I like the visual element of Instagram, saying things more with pics than words. But the speed and the need for constant visibility can be too much. So, I go at my own comfortable pace.

    The blogs are the best for me. But don’t ever feel bad for not being around, we have to fit many things in a day. Sometimes it’s simple not possible to do the rounds.

    Internet radio sounds interesting. I’ll certainly find time to check it out. Thanks AJ for reading. 🙂

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